Talent Night
by TR-Fanfic
Summary: On New Years Eve 2003, Harm and Mac finally find a way to get through to each other. Yes two songs are sung in the first and second parts, but this is NOT a song fic. Post Paraguay, preWebb. This story gets very steamy.
1. Pleadings on stage

**This story is set New Years Eve 2003-2004. It's something I have had in my head for a million years. The songs in this fic are "FULL OF GRACE" by Sarah Maclachlan, and "BABY CAN I HOLD YOU" by Tracy Chapman. Both songs I believe fit the story and characters very well. I was tempted to have Mac sing "I SHALL BELIEVE by Sheryl Crow. If you don't know that song, I suggest you look it up. It's tremendous. If you think it fits better with the story. Play it on your computer while Mac is singing. Believe me, it's effective that way. **

This is unbetaed and unedited. All mistakes are my own. 

Disclaimer. I don't own JAG and if I did, I would quit writing about infidelity. It dishonors the characters. 

Honest Feedback is always appreciated.

Talent Night   
Rated Adult (For some lovin' going on)  
By TR

Harm sat in a darkened corner of McMurphy's, deep in thought, nursing a bottle of mineral water. For some reason beer just didn't seem all that appealing anymore. Occasionally he'd put the bottle down and give a courteous, if distracted, round of applause for whomever of his co-workers was performing on the small stage. He sighed and looked around. Despite the festive surroundings, and familiarity of the company, Harm felt strangely disconnected somehow. He should be having fun, this was exactly what he'd wanted when he had come back into the JAG fold. To sit and laugh with the people he considered family. He had spent the last 8 New Years Eve's in this place, watching the most talented of the group show their stuff on stage in the "Annual New Years Eve JAG talent night". Harm had looked forward to this date every year, every year except this one. 

Three performances into the show, he realized why the joy had been taken out of it, he had turned automatically to the chair next to him, seeking a presence who had always been there, especially on this night, but she wasn't there. She wasn't there, and suddenly none of it mattered anymore. Inwardly he wondered how he would get through it when his time came to perform. By silent agreement, the group had always slated Harm as the last performer, the one who would ring in the New Year. He had prepared a particularly festive performance. A blues number that was one of Mac's favorites. Now he wasn't sure if he could pull it off. 

He found himself scanning the crowd, seeking out a woman who had never been anything but beautiful to him. He found her standing at the bar, talking with Jennifer Coates. She was nodding her head and looking down at the floor, as Coates laid a hand on her arm, giving her what appeared to be words of encouragement. Harm fought the urge to go to her, find out what was weighing on her mind, and make it better. It was a practice that came as naturally to him as breathing. If Mac was in distress, it was his job to rescue her. No matter the distance between them, he could never seem to shake his sense of belonging and responsibility when it came to her. 

He sighed and took another pull from the bottle, and quietly wondered why she had been standoffish with him all day long. He had tried to engage her in conversation numerous times throughout the day, but was met with one-word answers. By lunch hour he had given up. He didn't get the impression that she was angry with him, or even hurt, she was just…distressed. He hoped at some point she could work out whatever it was in her own head, if she wasn't willing to talk to him about it.

Harm sat up straighter, and applauded as the latest performance came to an end. He glanced back at Mac and saw her close her eyes, and take a deep breath, before making her way to the stage. Harm raised his eyebrows, it was hit and miss as to whether Mac would perform in the show each year, this year though, for some reason, he hadn't expected her to. Obviously he had been wrong. He watched as she took her place on stage. She sat on the stool and waited as Harriet pulled up a chair next to her and began to tune her guitar. When Harriet was prepared, she nodded to Mac, who in turn searched the crowd. When her eyes fell on Harm, they stayed there. For a moment she looked like she might burst into tears, but then pursed her lips and swallowed them down. Harm, for his part, stayed rooted to his chair, and didn't bother to fight the pull of her eyes. She broke contact long enough to briefly glance at Harriet. Harriet nodded and began to play a slow tune. Harm found it impossible to look away as Mac's gaze locked with his once more, and she began to sing in a slow, clear alto.

The winter here's cold and bitter  
And it's chilled us to the bone  
We haven't seen the sun for weeks  
Too long, too far from home

I feel just like I'm sinking  
And I claw for solid ground  
I'm pulled down by the undertow  
Never thought I could feel so low  
Oh darkness, I feel like letting go 

Mac paused and swallowed a lump in her throat, before she continued in a soulful, heartfelt voice.

If all of your strength and all of your courage  
Come and lift me from this place   
I know I can love you much better than this.  
Full of Grace   
Full of Grace  
My love.

Harriet picked out a small solo, and Mac waited, holding Harm's eyes all the while. Willing him to hear her. To understand. A steady stream of tears rolled down her cheeks. Her eyes were pleading when she began to sing again.

So it's better this way, I said   
Having seen this place before  
Where everything we say and do   
Hurts us all the more

It's just that we stayed too long   
In the same old sickly skin

I'm pulled down by the undertow  
Never thought I could feel so low  
Oh darkness, I feel like letting go

If all of your strength and all of your courage  
Come and lift me from this place  
I know I can love you much better than this.  
Full of Grace  
Full of Grace  
My love. 

Harriet's playing ceased and Mac sang the last line, in a thick tearful voice.

I know I can love you much better than this.  
Full of Grace  
My love. 

Mac's shaky voice whispered the last note, and the song was over. Everyone sat silently staring. Their eyes volleying between Harm and Mac, who, for their part, hadn't moved an inch or broken their gaze. Mac's heart pounded at a punishing rate, and then plummeted as Harm suddenly broke eye contact, rose from his seat and strode out of the room. 


	2. Responding in Kind

Mac took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. Somehow it didn't lessen the ache in her chest. She was oblivious to the scattered applause that peppered the room. Her eyes were still trained on the door in the back. Slowly she came to her senses and left the stage, intending to grab her purse and make a hasty exit. AJ headed her off at the pass, the look that Harm flashed him before he left, told him he had something in mind. It would be a shame if Mac wasn't around to see it.

"Going somewhere Mac?"

Mac jumped. "Sir?"

"I asked if you were going somewhere."

"Yes, I…I'm not feeling well, I'd like to go home."

AJ put a hand on her shoulder. "Mac," he said gently. "Why don't you catch your breath, sit and enjoy the show, you can leave after a while."

"Admiral, please…"

AJ sighed. "Mac, do I need to make it an order?"

Mac pursed her lips in resignation. "No sir," she muttered, and took the closest empty seat.

AJ returned to his table, and prayed that he had bought Harm enough time to do whatever he was planning. He knew Mac would stay for a total of ten minutes tops, then he wouldn't be able to stop her from leaving. As luck would have it, they only had to wait a few minutes before Harm made his appearance.

Mac sat staring at the tabletop, wishing away the pain in her heart, and trying her best to shut out the people around her. She wondered why the Admiral was so set on keeping her there, but it was too much effort to question him about it. She only raised her head when Harriet made a special announcement from the stage.

"Commander Rabb has requested that we change the order of things around a bit tonight. Instead of performing last, as has become tradition, he would, understandably, like to do his number now."

Mac's eyes were riveted to the stage, as were everyone else's in the room. She saw him come through the door behind the small stage and search her out. She instinctively sat up straighter. When he found her, he smiled a small, awkward smile, and then spoke into the microphone.

"I was originally going to do what Mac so eloquently calls the "Rabb version" of Alberta, but I think this one is a little more important."

He made eye contact with Mac once more, and then closed his eyes and began to play his guitar. After a short intro, he began to sing.

Sorry

Is all that I can't say

Years gone by and still

Words don't come easily

Like sorry, like sorry

Forgive Me

Is all that I can't say

Years gone by and still

Words don't come easily

Like forgive me, forgive me

Harm opened his eyes and looked directly at her as he began to sing the chorus.

So I say baby

Baby can I hold you tonight.

Maybe if I told you the right words

At the right time

You'd be mine.

Mac's eyes shimmered with a fresh batch of unshed tears. Tears that promptly fell when he began to sing the last verse.

I love you

Is all that I can't say

Years gone by and still

Words don't come easily.

Like I love you, I love you

So I say baby

Baby can I hold you tonight

Maybe if I told you the right words

At the right time

You'd be mine.

Baby can I hold you tonight

Maybe if I told you the right words

Ooh at the right time.

You'd be mine.

You'd be mine.

Harm set his guitar on the stand next to the microphone and made his way down to where Mac was sitting. The whole room watched with wide eyes as he moved to stand in front of her. After a long moment, he reached out his hand to her, and simply said, "Walk with me."

Mac nodded and took his hand. Together they walked out of McMurphy's pub oblivious to the cheers of their friends and family.

TBC...


	3. Reconnecting

Mac was the first to speak. "Where are we going?"

"Somewhere quiet."

"That's going to be difficult on New Years Eve."

"We'll manage," Harm replied, looking Mac in the eye for the first time since they left the pub. He simply smiled.

Mac took a deep breath, plowing on as she always did, right into the heart of the matter. "I suppose we do need some place quiet. We have a lot to talk about."

"There isn't all that much to talk about, not really."

Mac frowned. "What do you mean?"

"We've said most of the things we need to say already, haven't we?"

Mac stopped, and faced him. "Not the half of it."

Harm sighed. "Mac, I'm not interested in having "The Discussion".

Mac's eyes flashed with frustration and incredulity. "You're tabling it again?"

"Yes."

She pulled her hand away. "For how long?"

"Forever."

Before he could say anything further, Mac paced away two strides, and then turned back and came toe to toe with him. "I don't believe this." Was all she could get out.

"Mac, we've said the important things. Or at least, we've sung them." He waited until she raised her eyes before he continued. "What good is a big long discussion going to do, when we've already said I love you and I'm sorry? I don't know about you, but I'm not interested in pulling out the score card and playing a game of 'You hurt me here, I hurt you there'. What's done is done, Mac."

After a long contemplative pause, she gave him a small apologetic smile. "I can live with that."

Harm smiled and offered his hand. When she accepted it, they began to walk again. They walked in silence for a while, until they found themselves in a park by the shore of a small lake. There they sat on a park bench, and watched leaves floating in circular patterns over the water.

"Mac?"

"Hmm?"

"What did you want to be when you grew up?"

She gave a derisive snort. "Something better than this."

Harm's head popped up and regarded her with surprise. "I thought you loved working at JAG."

"I do. That's not what I'm talking about. I love JAG, but JAG isn't what I am. It…it doesn't define me."

"Not like me," He replied quietly.

"No, not like you," She agreed. "When I was a kid, I didn't have a whole lot of time to think about what I wanted to be. I just wanted to get out of there. But sometimes it was quiet enough in the house that I had time to dream. I pictured myself being someone who helped other people, who smiled all the time, who was…happy."

"And you don't think you've achieved that?"

Mac's voice rose. "Look at me Harm? I've become someone who is huddled in a corner observing her own life. I can't even be honest about what's going on in my own heart." She stopped and shook her head. "This isn't what I wanted to be." Her eyes glowed with determination. "I'm better than this."

Harm squeezed her hand in sympathetic encouragement, but offered no words.

"What about you?" She asked.

Harm gave a laugh. "Oh yeah, I am what I've always wanted to be aren't I? Not quite a pilot, not quite a lawyer, not quite a father…" He stopped and looked her in the eye, his voice dropping in regret. "Not a husband. Mac, it's safe to say that I have never fully accomplished anything that I wanted out of my life."

She looked at him incredulous. "How can you say that? You've always been such a…hero."

He smirked at her. "Funny, I was thinking the same thing about you." He turned to face her. "I'm forty years old. And it's been a long time coming, but I'm finally learning that my outward accomplishments don't count for squat if I have to come home to an empty apartment. My career has always defined me, and I've been half a man because of it. You're not the only one sitting back and observing your own life. I know I'm better than this." Mac nodded, contemplating.

They lapsed into an easy silence as they watched the interplay of the leaves, fighting against the breeze on top of the water. Inevitably the leaves would lose the fight, and go where destiny took them. Even if it was in circles, and they ended up back where they started, they still had no say in their direction. It was a fitting display for a moment like this. When clarity had come swiftly, and they realized that fighting against destiny was a futile and exhausting exercise. It was time to surrender. That much was crystal clear.

TBC...


	4. Do you dream about me?

Harm began to stroke her hand, when he felt her tremble slightly in his grasp. She felt like silk, and he wondered what it would be like to be housed inside her skin. Not just to make love to her, but to live within that soft shell. To see himself through her eyes. He wondered if her heart quickened when he walked into the room – like his did whenever she was near. He wondered what she thought about when she stared unseeing out the window of her office. He wondered if she ever woke up from her dreams with his name on her lips.

"Harm?" She said, as if reading his mind. "Do you remember your dreams?

He frowned at he odd question, but opted to answer honestly. "Only the ones about you."

Mac's eyes widened, even as they glittered with flattery. "You dream about me?"

"All the time."

The light in Mac's eyes dimmed at his tone. "Somehow that doesn't sound like a compliment."

Harm glanced up and met her eyes, and then looked back over the water. "Sometimes it is," He told her with a half-hearted smirk. "But lately, you haven't exactly been in the safest of circumstances. And your…affiliation with Webb hasn't exactly set my mind at ease."

Mac squeezed his hand. "That's never been a serious issue Harm."

He looked at her for a long moment, and decided to take her at her word. "Maybe not romantically, but that doesn't stop him from using your…friendship to goad you into going on another insane mission."

Mac's eyes narrowed. "I won't allow myself to be used," She declared, and then hedged. "But, if there's a mission presented to me that I know I can accomplish, I won't promise you that I will refuse it."

Harm stared at the ground, and gave a grim nod. Mac reached out and lifted his chin. "However, I can promise you one thing."

"What's that?"

"I can promise that - if I have any say in the matter – I won't go anywhere without you."

"And exactly how are you going to convince the Admiral that I have to go with you?"

"Oh that one's going to be easy. I'll just remind him that you're going to drop everything and follow me anyway, so he might as well send you in the first place."

He laughed. Receiving her acknowledgement of his sacrifice in the spirit in which it was intended. "And how are you going to convince Webb that I need to go with you?"

"That one's going to be a little trickier. But I figure if I keep insisting that I won't go without you, than maybe he'll get the hint and quit asking me altogether."

"That's a good plan."

Mac looked him in the eye. "It's the only one that would work, Harm. We have tried to deny it for much too long, the truth is, we come as a set. We always have. I don't think we'll have a difficult time convincing anyone else of that."

"No, I don't think anyone will be surprised by that." He paused for a long moment. "What about you? Do you remember your dreams?"

"All of them."

Harm raised his eyebrows. "Really?"

"Yeah. Sometimes I remember them for days afterward."

"Bad dreams?"

"Most of them," She replied, and then quickly added. "Well, not really bad, just…disturbing, but I'm used to it."

"How long has this been going on?"

"Since I can remember." Harm stared at her in shock. "My life has never settled down enough to let my mind be at ease, Harm. I told my therapist about them, and she said it was because I never deal with stress while I'm awake; I push it aside so that I can get through my day. It's my minds way of dealing with things, when I don't have real life in the way to distract me."

Harm nodded. "That makes sense I guess."

"Yeah it does."

"So, when did you start seeing a therapist?"

Mac searched his face, and saw no trace of mockery. "Since you walked out of my life."

"Mac…"

"We went through a lot in Paraguay, Harm. More than I'm sure either of us wants to remember. I've been through traumatic things before, but I've always been able to come home with you and work through it. This time I didn't have you." She held up a hand. "That's my fault, I know. I didn't have you to help me, so I turned to someone who could."

"I didn't realize how much I…affected you."

Mac whispered, "Neither did I."

Harm gave her an affectionate smile, and reached out to lightly caress her cheek. "Do you dream about me?"

"All the time."

Hiss expression melted into one of concern. "Bad dreams?"

It was Mac's turn to smirk. "Not all of them. Some of them have been very…stimulating. But you haven't exactly been in the safest of situations either. I worried about you non-stop, that was bound to give me nightmares."

"Sorry."

"Me too."

TBC...


	5. Starting the Fire

**Harm leaned down to lay a kiss on her hand, blowing lightly when he felt the chill of her fingers against his lips. Mac shivered. "Hey you're cold," He said, as he began to remove his jacket to give to her. Mac stopped him with a hand on his arm. **

"No, keep it."

"But…"

"I know," She said with a glint in her eye. "You have to be a gentleman, but the truth is, I'd rather have your arms than your jacket."

Harm grinned, turned sideways on the bench, and extended his arms to her. She immediately moved to sit against him. Her back to his chest. Harm wrapped his arms around her, and placed his legs over hers in an effort to keep her warm. "Better?" He asked against her hair.

"Much." 

They sat that way for a while. Basking in the feel of each other. It was a freedom they had never allowed themselves until now.

"So have you made any resolutions this year?" Harm asked against her ear.

"Yeah, I resolve not to be such a coward anymore."

"Hey, don't you think you're being a little hard on yourself?"

"No Harm, I've been a coward about everything that is important."

"No more than I have."

"Maybe," She conceded. "But it's going to stop."

Harm looked up into the hazy sky. "The hum of friendship is easier to dance to, than the pluck of heartstrings," He said softly. Mac turned to look up at him. "It's something that Harriet said to me a while back. When I went to see the baby for the first time, she asked if I had been in contact with you. That's what she told me when I said I hadn't." He reached out and smoothed a strand of hair away from her forehead. "It's not cowardice Mac, it's just…we don't know any other way to dance."

"I'm finished dancing."

"Dancing isn't so terrible as long as you have a partner who's willing to move his feet," He said, ducking down to lay his cheek on her forehead. 

"Do I?" She asked softly. He drew back to look her in the eye. "Do I have a willing partner?"

"Yes you do," He whispered to her. Mac saw the light wink off of his ring, as he lifted his hand to her face, and leaned down to kiss her. For a split second, there was complete silence. The deep breath before the plunge. And then their lips combined, and they were home. In the beginning the kiss was reminiscent of the others they had shared. It spoke of friendship, desperation, passion, and thanks. Very quickly it melted into something entirely new, and yet achingly familiar. They relaxed into each other, reveling in the relief of surrender. When they pulled back Mac flashed him the first genuine smile he'd seen from her in almost a year. 

"What about you? Have you made any resolutions this year?" She asked, breathless.

"I just made one right now."

"What's that?"

"I'm going to make you smile like that, as many times as I can. It's one of the things I miss most about you."

"You don't have to miss me Harm, I'm right here."

Harm sighed. "Mac, I've missed you for the better part of a year. Everything about you." He ran a hand down curve of her arm. "Didn't we used to touch more? Didn't we used to laugh more?" He shook his head. "It's odd the things you take for granted when everything is good. I don't know when we started to…separate. I don't really care to go back and find out. But if I can make you smile like that at least once a day, we'll be in good shape."

"I look forward to it." She moved out of his arms and turned to face him. For a moment she just stared. "Harm, what was the most frightening mission you've ever been on?"

He looked at her in surprise, and then dropped his head to study his hands. "That's a hard one Mac, I've been on a lot of dangerous missions in the last twenty years. But I think…" He raised his head. "I think Paraguay wins hands down. Not knowing whether you were dead or alive, was by far the most frightening experience I've ever had. I would have rather been there strapped to that table, knowing that you were safe at home, than to see you…." He took a deep breath, faltering. Mac reached out and laid a hand on his arm. She said nothing, but he acknowledged her silent tearful apology, with a tender nod.

Harm cleared his throat. "What's the most frightening mission you've ever been on?" 

Mac's eyes twinkled in the light off the water. She managed to look smug and apprehensive at the same time. "The one I'm about to embark on right now."

Harm's brow furrowed. "Which one is that?"

"Taking you home, and making sure you never leave," She declared, as she stood and stretched her hand out to him. 

Harm gaped at her, and then gave her an endearing smile. "That mission shouldn't be frightening," He told her softly.

"But it is…" 

"Well it shouldn't be," He said, taking her outstretched hand and kissing it. "Because it's a sure thing." 

Mac grinned and tugged on his hand, pulling him up from the bench. Her eyes traveled his body, and she slowly smoothed her hands over his arms and down his chest. Harm shivered slightly. She raised an eyebrow. "Oh no, you're cold. We better get you home and out of those clothes."

Harm laughed. "You don't beat around the bush do you?"

"Are you kidding? We've beaten that poor bush into kindling." She pulled him in close to her and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I think it's time we start the fire," She murmured against his lips, a second before delivering a devastating kiss. Harm held onto her body, as much to keep himself vertical as her. He wasn't used to being knocked off his feet, but he fully expected to enjoy every minute of it.

**TBC…**


	6. Sweet Surrender

It took twenty minutes flat to get back to their cars and head over to Mac's apartment. When they walked in the door an air of familiarity settled over them. Harm took off his jacket and shoes and put them in the usual places, and automatically headed for the kitchen. Mac shed her jacket and headed for the bedroom. When she came out she was wearing a pair of tan hip hugger soft velour sweats with a drawstring and a tight black t-shirt that ended just above her navel. Her feet were bare. She walked over to the stereo.

Harm appeared in the doorway to the kitchen. "Do you want some…?" His question trailed off as he looked to see Mac bending over selecting a CD, the fabric of her pants formed perfectly around the tight swell of her six. And suddenly he found it difficult to breathe. She settled on a CD, and raised slowly her lower back muscles shifting with the movement. When she turned his eyes were glued to the creamy patch of skin visible slightly above her waistband.

"You were saying?"

It took him a second to find his voice, and Mac smirked as he scanned her form. "I uh…I wanted to know if you want some tea."

"No. I want you to come over here and dance with me."

Harm smiled and made his way over to her. When the music began, he put his hands on her waist and pulled her close to him.

"We didn't get to dance at the pub like we normally do," She said, as she linked her hands behind his neck.

"You wouldn't let me near you," He replied, as he began to slowly move to the music. Mac responded by closing her eyes and resting her forehead on his chest. Harm moved his hands over the dark creamy skin at her waist and lower back. "How long had you been planning on serenading me?" He asked her softly.

Mac raised her head. "Since last night when I was listening to the CD."

He turned her slightly, and his hands slipped down over her six, and then back up to her bare skin. Caressing her in time to the music. "Is that why you wouldn't say more than two words to me today?"

"I didn't want to lose my nerve."

"I'm glad you didn't," He replied, as he moved his hands slowly beneath her shirt and up her back, exposing her skin to the cool air of the apartment. He suppressed a groan when he didn't encounter a bra strap, and pulled her closer to him.

Mac trailed her hands from the back of his neck to the sides of his face. Slowly she reached up and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

They turned, still swaying. Mac pulled back and moved her hands down his body. When she came to the space below his navel, she reached in and pulled his shirttail from the waistband of his jeans.

Harm laid a kiss on the crown of her bowed head, as she worked on the buttons of his shirt. It only took a moment to get them all undone. She moved the shirt from his shoulders, gathered it and tossed it aside. Mac paused for a moment, looking him over, then wrapped her arms around him and laid her head against his chest. Holding him to her, as she moved against him to the beat of the music. Harm rubbed his hands over her back, laying his cheek against her hair.

She lifted her face just enough to lay a soft kiss on the hollow of his neck, and stepped back. Trailing her hand from his side, over his pecs and around his back. She let her lips graze the bare flesh of his arm as she moved to stand behind him. Her hands came together at his shoulder blades, and then moved down, memorizing the muscles of his back. Slowly she dropped them lower, stroking then squeezing lightly on his tight six, before dipping her fingers into his waistband. She traced the seam of his jeans around to his well-toned abs. Splaying her hands she dipped slightly deeper beneath his fly, teasing him, before she raised her hand higher. The moment her hands touched his chest, her lips made contact with his back. Methodically, she traced her fingers over the muscles of his chest, even as her lips and tongue mimicked her movements over the skin of his back. Harm closed his eyes, as she touched him in time with the slow pulse of the music. He had never been focused on like this before and his heart swelled. With Mac it was different. She was, in all ways, his equal. He didn't have the pressure to perform. The passion that had existed between them since the moment they met was unmistakable. There was no doubt that loving Mac – on all levels - was going to be the experience of a lifetime. He stood before her, and for the first time allowed himself to just be loved.

TBC...


	7. Love by the light of the Christmas Tree

**He felt her draw away from him, and opened his eyes in time to see her black shirt land next to his in his peripheral vision. Before he had time to react he felt her soft, full, bare breasts make contact with the skin of his back. He couldn't suppress a groan when she wrapped her arms around him and held him against her. He felt the warmth of her skin and the hardness of her nipples pressed against his flesh. He reached down and held one of her hands, laying a kiss on each of her fingers. Mac began to kiss his back. He lifted her hand and stroked it against his cheek. Scrubbing his stubble on her smooth skin. Mac's finger traced over the softness of his lips, and down his jaw. Slowly she came around to face him again, her lips and nipples grazing lightly over his back and arm. To her surprise he looked her directly in the eye. Only after she returned his endearing smile did he let his gaze drop to her exposed breasts.**

Harm caught his breath, as he saw her skin bathed in the light of the Christmas tree. "Wow," He whispered before he reached out and placed his hands on her narrow rib cage. Slowly he pulled her in close to him, cherishing the feel of her warm skin against his. She began to move once more with the music, and as she swayed, her erect nipples teased against the muscles of his chest. Harm dipped his head, and kissed her. Rhythmically caressing, nipping and tasting her lips, until Mac raised her hands to his neck and pulled him in, fusing their mouths together. She didn't bother to beg entrance, she just slipped her tongue past his parted lips and claimed him. Harm raised his hand to the back of her head, keeping her close. Mac let out a small whimpering groan when his fingers began to lightly massage her scalp in time with the thrust and retreat of their tongues and bodies.

Harm moved from her mouth, his panting breath fanning her cheek, as he slowly trailed his lips over her jaw and down her neck. Mac arched her back, letting him take the weight of her upper body in his hands. He held her firm, his thumbs landing just below the under curve of her breasts. His mouth followed the line of her collarbone, and up the column of her neck. When he reached the hollow just below her ear, he traced a slow circular pattern with the tip of his tongue.

She simultaneously gasped and shivered. It took her a moment to realize that his thumbs were tracing the same pattern over the tips of her nipples. She turned her head to the side laying a soft wet kiss on the top of his ear, and then pulled him up once more and took his mouth, as she moved her hands from his shoulders and down his arms. When she got to his hands, she lifted them higher to fully cup her breasts. She pressed firmly into the palms of his hands until he began to slowly knead them. Her hands made their way down to where their bodies were still moving to the music. She slipped her fingers between them and cupped him through his jeans before raising her hands to the buttons of his fly. In one deft movement, she had his fly open, revealing the top of his black jockey shorts.

Mac looked up and gave him a grin, before she moved his hands from her breasts and placed them on her back. Once again she wrapped her arms around him, pressing in close, kissing his neck and slowly dropping from his chest, to his sides, to finally the tiny strip of hair below his naval. Her lips and tongue outlining his incredible muscular form. As she sank to her knees she hooked her fingers into the waste band of his jeans and pulled them to the floor. Briefly he held onto her shoulders for leverage as he stepped out of them and kicked them aside. She smoothed her hands up his thighs and over the ever-growing bulge housed between them. It was her turn to be impressed.

"Wow, Rabb."

He grinned, and she laughed as he blushed at the compliment. He pulled her to her feet and ran a hand through her silky hair before his hands trailed over her breasts and dropped to the drawstring of her pants. He loosened the string, even as her hands dipped into the waistband of his shorts. In two seconds flat they were standing together in all their glory. Swaying to the music, skin to skin. Their bodies were covered only by the multi-colored splatters of light from the Christmas tree. It took a total of 30 seconds for the feeling of skin against skin to sink in and take hold, and when it did, it didn't let go.

Mac cupped the sides of his face, and took his mouth, holding him steadily against her, loving him with every stroke. Harm groaned, and moved his hands over her body in long intense strokes. When he bent to take her breast in his mouth, Mac went down with him and they both sank to their knees. Harm sat back on his haunches, and Mac wrapped her legs around his waist. She moaned and threw her head back, holding the sides of his face with her hands. She gasped as she stroked his cheeks and jaw, feeling him sucking her flesh from the outside. She shifted and braced her knees on the floor, and then pulled her breast away, now moistened and pink by the treatment of his mouth.

He raised his head, and she looked him in the eye. "I love you," she whispered, and the instant she claimed his mouth, she sank down and swallowed him inside her.

The movement robbed him of breath. "Mac." He managed to ground out in surprise. She wrapped her arms around his neck and began to move over him.

"Shh, just feel it," She whispered. Harm closed his eyes in surrender. They melted together. 

She set the rhythm nice and slow. Moving with the pulse of the music, she held him close to her body, lifting and descending in long intense strokes, loving him away from the stresses their lives held outside those doors.

Harm chanted her name on a breathless groaning whisper. She moaned with him as his big hands kneaded the sculpted muscles of her back. His hands moved lower as he felt her pick up speed. He cupped her hips where her leg met her backside and helped her increase the pace.

She began to lay soft kisses over his face from his forehead to his jaw as she moved. "You're so beautiful," She panted. "I love the way you feel." 

Harm gasped as Mac slowed her stroke and rhythmically rippled her inner muscles around him. The grab and release of her flesh over his, was almost enough to bring him all the way home, almost, but not quite. She rotated over him, adding pressure here, relieving it there. His breath quickened, he'd never felt anything like it in his life. He should have known it would be this way with her. Everything about her was unlike anything he'd ever known before. Her outward motion had all but stopped, but inside she milked him with the constant pulse of tight, warm, wet flesh. Harm's eyes widened. "How…how are you doing that?" He breathed.

Mac grinned, and answered just as breathlessly, "Magic."

Harm grinned back, but it quickly melted into an expression of pure ecstasy as she shifted the rotation of her hips. Mac closed her eyes and held her breath, and it pleased him beyond measure to see that she was getting just as much pleasure from this as he was. When she opened her eyes they were glistening with emotion. She stopped completely, and took his face in her hands. Their gazes locked tight, and didn't waver. Opening up, she bared her soul, dropping every barrier she possessed. Her beautiful brown eyes rained tears onto her cheeks, entreating him to accept what she so fervently offered. Her heart. She loved him to the core. He responded in kind, and the depth of the devotion on his face left her breathless. Suddenly they began to move together no longer of their own accord, but as one. Their mouths fused in a fury of passion, even as their bodies did the same. 

They laid kisses over every inch of flesh within reach. Mac held tight to his shoulders and gave him all she had. Harm moved his hips in erratic thrusts, even as Mac moved over him in rapid, hot, passionate strokes.

They whispered soft words of love and encouragement.

"Oh, yeah right there, just like that." 

"Like that?"

"Yeah, ahh...just like that."

"You feel so good."

"So do you."

"I'm close."

"Just let it come, I'm right here with you."

"I love you."

"I love you too baby."

Their bodies tensed, and with one last downward thrust, they gasped and came home together.

**TBC…**


	8. Strawberries and cream

It took a moment for Harm to realize that his eyes were still clenched shut. Only when he felt her soft lips graze over his closed lids, did he try to open them. Even then he felt like the room was spinning. He could barely hear her soft tender words over the rush of blood in his ears.

"You in there somewhere baby?" She asked against his ear.

"Somewhere," He replied, with a small laugh. "I still can't focus yet."

Mac chuckled. "I'll take that as a compliment."

"You should." He drew back to look her in the eye. "Are you always this good?"

Mac reddened. "I don't know. I can honestly say I've never had anyone else react the way you are, but I…I don't know…"

Harm frowned. Forgetting all semblance of lovemaking etiquette. "The others didn't like that…that thing you did?"

Mac cocked her head to side, amused at his lack of discretion. "I've never done that 'thing' with anyone else."

Her comment snapped him out of his daze, as profound warmth washed over him. He gathered her close in his arms. "Thank You." He whispered to her. "You're amazing."

"So are you."

"Me? I didn't do much of anything."

She pulled back and laughed. "Well if that wasn't doing much of anything, I'd like to see what happens when you actually participate."

Harm's eyes sparkled. "You're on," He murmured, and then he kissed her with everything he had in him. When he pulled back, Mac slowly lifted up off of him, and rolled on to her back. Her breasts bobbed as she attempted to catch her breath. Harm lay down beside her and smoothed his hand in slow circles over the damp skin of her stomach.

"I love your skin," He whispered in her ear. She smiled up at him, touched by the appreciative light in his eyes. "You're so soft."

Her eyes drifted closed as his hand slowly trailed from her stomach, to her breasts, to the hollow of her neck. She turned her head and kissed his finger as it traced the outline of her jaw. His touch was light.

"Do you have any idea how long I've wanted to do this?" He asked in a low voice. She opened her eyes. "To just be here like this with you. In the light of the Christmas tree, without a stitch of clothes on." He caught her eye and grinned. "You know Mac, there's rarely been a day go by since I've known you that I haven't wondered what you looked like underneath that uniform." He scanned her form, and raised an eyebrow. "I have to say, my imagination didn't hold a candle to this."

She blushed. "Thanks."

He leaned down and kissed her softly. Moving his hand to cup her breast and then down to her hip. His thumb traced the feminine line from her hip to her inner thigh, and back again. "You're so beautiful," he murmured. "I never want to stop touching you."

"Then don't," she said breathlessly.

He gave her a warm smile, and leaned in again. Laying barely there kisses over her face and neck. Mac sighed and arched her back, causing her breasts to press against his chest. Harm groaned, and moved lower, trailing the tip of his tongue down the valley between her breasts. He ran his hands up her sides and laced his fingers through hers, holding her captive, as his tongue outlined the roundness of her breast, then flicked over the tip of her nipple. Mac gasped, and pulled her hands free, burying them in his hair. Harm lapped at her nipple, then blew lightly. His eyebrows rose in amusement as he watched her skin pucker, and he felt her shiver. An idea was forming.

Mac caught his eye, noting his mischievous grin. "What?" She asked, panting.

"Close your eyes," he said in a velvet voice.

"Why?"

"You said you want to see what it's like when I participate, I'm going to show you."

She gave him a dreamy sigh. "You were doing pretty well a second ago."

"Just close your eyes," He whispered.

"Harm…"

He stroked her hair. "I love you Mac. Trust me."

Mac's eyes drifted closed. "Okay."

He gave her one last kiss before she felt him leave her side. A few seconds later she heard the refrigerator door open.

"Harm, what are you…"

He peeked his head around the doorway. "Eyes closed Mackenzie."

She heard him chuckle as her eyebrows rose over her closed eyes, and she folded her arms across her chest. "Or what?"

His voice dropped to a tone that made her heart trip. "Or I WON'T come back and finish what I started."

"We can't have that," she said as she lay back down on the floor and waited for him to come back to her.

She didn't have to wait long. Less than a minute later she felt him settle down next to her. "Keep your eyes closed," he whispered. "Just feel."

She opened her mouth to say something but he stifled her words with a tender kiss. A moment later she gasped against his lips as something cold and creamy made contact with her breast. A shiver ran through her, and she moaned as he released her lips only to sink his mouth over the cold tip of her nipple. The warmth of his mouth in contrast with the cold had a wave of pleasure washing over her, and she clung helplessly to him. Quickly he repeated the treatment on her other breast. Swirling the sweet cream around her nipple, than lapping it up from her gathered skin, before he offered her a taste. She opened her mouth at the pressure against her lips and found a ripe strawberry waiting there, covered in whipped cream.

"Mmm," she moaned, as she bit into it. "Strawberries and cream."

"Mm Hmm," he answered. "You like it?"

"I love it," she replied, and turned her mouth toward him. He kissed her with more passion than she anticipated, and she fought to keep her eyes closed when he pulled away. She so wanted to see him. To see if the fantasy playing behind her eyes, measured up to the sight of him eating his night's desert from her breasts. "Do it again," she panted.

And he did. Over and over. Until every strawberry from the plate was gone, and Mac's skin tingled from head to toe. She'd never felt anything like it in her life.

TBC...


	9. Round two and straight on until morning

"You can open your eyes now," he whispered.

When he swam into focus, he was poised on his hands and knees, leaning down. She watched the faint light casting shadows over the muscle of his back and arms. His hair was mussed where she'd laced her fingers through it. She could feel, more than see the tip of his erection resting against her thigh. His chin landed just below her navel. He was breathtaking. 

Left over trails of whipped cream striped her torso. He grinned, and she saw his tongue peek out through his teeth. She watched breathless, as he moved up her body, rapidly lapping up every bit of cream from her skin. When he reached her mouth he kissed her with everything he had. Mac's blood sang in her veins. She wanted this man. Needed him with every fiber of her soul. If she could find the strength to move she'd flip him over and take him in a second flat. He had other ideas. She felt him tug her up to a sitting position, then to her feet. She didn't have time for embarrassment when her knees faltered. He was already scooping her up into his arms. Still not breaking the kiss, he carried her unerringly to the bathroom. Once there he set her on the floor and turned on the shower. Still joined at the mouth, they stepped in.

The stood beneath the hot spray, basking in the feeling of wet warm skin against skin. To her surprise the passion of his kisses increased, but now they were laced with a loving tenderness that stole her breath. She hadn't expected this. Hadn't expected to feel so many raw emotions coming from deep within him. And yet, it was so like Harm. He was everything, a warrior, a lover, a jester, a giver, a receiver, a servant, and a king, all wrapped in one. It shouldn't have surprised her that he would show every side in one single bout of lovemaking.

Their breathing was labored as they touched every piece of flesh within reach. Harm kissed Mac's neck and shoulders and breasts over and over, dropping low to suckle on her sensitive bud, only to be pulled back up and once again kissed breathless.

Panting he looked her in the eye. "Mac…" 

"Please, no more teasing." She breathed. He'd brought her so close to the edge so many times in the last few hours. Only to hold back and delay their joining. She'd accepted this, realizing his need for recovery time, after all he was only human, but now there was no question in her mind. He was fully recovered, and pressing firmly against her belly. Her breath came in gasps as his hands took the weight of her breasts.

He kissed the sensitive skin beneath her ear. "Tell me what you want."

"You," she pled. "I want you. Now."

Harm dropped his hands down, cupped her six, and lifted her. He turned and pressed her against the wall. His weight keeping her in place. "Now?"

"Now!" She gasped. "Harm, right now!"

The moment the words were out of her mouth he drove hard into her. She cried out at his total possession. Shuddering at the feeling of absolute completeness. He held her firm against the tile, stilling for a brief moment. "I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" He whispered.

"No, don't you dare stop!"

With that he began to move in earnest. Giving her his all. She closed her eyes and surrendered. Feeling her soul unravel little by little with each powerful thrust of his hips. She wrapped her legs around his waist, opening completely to him. Harm kneaded her six, as he moved inside her. It didn't take long until his thrusts became erratic. His body tensing against hers. She held on tight, feeling her own release just a moment away. She pressed in closer, grinding her pelvis against him.

Harm heard her breathing change, and pulled back enough to see her face. Her eyes were clenched tight as she bore down poised for release. He held back, waiting for her. "Mac," he whispered. "Mac look at me." She opened her eyes. They were foggy with desire. He held her gaze. "I love you," he told her. Then tightened his hold, and buried himself swiftly inside her. She came undone before his eyes. He watched in satisfaction as she arched her back, and cried out his name. Her muscled convulsed rapidly around him and he clamped down on his control. He wanted her to see him surrender to her, as she had to him.

Her orgasm subsided, and Mac slumped, panting against the wall. When her eyes focused on Harm, she noticed his jaw was clenched tight, and he was still hard as steel inside her. She kissed him slow and deep and began to move her hips. "My turn," she told him, and her movements became stronger and more deliberate. "I love you," she said. "Let it go."

He held her eyes as he moved with her, within moments his body tensed, and he thrust one more time inside her, she felt the warm pulse of fluid as he gave himself to her body and soul.

They stayed together that way for a long moment. Panting, basking in the soul shattering love they shared.

Slowly Harm released her, and helped her to stand. She grinned. "I don't think my legs will work."

"Mine either," he replied. He shook his head. "I know I've said this before, but wow!"

"I agree," she said emphatically, accepting the towel he offered her.

A few minutes later they fell into bed, utterly exhausted and thoroughly happy.

Harm pulled Mac's body closer to him, and laid a kiss on the back of her neck. Their breathing had slowed to almost normal. Their spent bodies moist with exertion and the water of the shower. Mac turned over to face him, and laid a soft kiss on his swollen lips. She chuckled and ran a hand through his still soaked hair, disengaging it from his forehead. For a moment she just looked at him. Her finger lightly tracing the line of his jaw.

"What?" Harm asked, unable to read her expression.

"I forgot how beautiful you are." She said softly.

Harm smiled and pulled her close, first kissing her shoulder, then her cheek. "That's my line." He said in her ear.

Mac grinned. "You used it once, now it's my turn."

Harm laughed and rolled her beneath him, propping himself up on his elbows. He leaned down and kissed her full and deep, and then drew back to look at her. Her skin glowed in the light of the rising sun. He smiled down at her and said. "Happy New Year, Mac."

"Happy New Year." She replied. Pulling him down to kiss her once more, then rolling them both once again to the side, and covering up with the blanket. Safely wrapped up in each other, it took them mere moments to drift into sleep.

The End


End file.
